Mail (May, 1998)

Viagra-vating
from The Fool

Ed: How about the good stuff, something to brighten things up after a long winter of cold moves???

Certainly, Ed, the Viagara story might heat things up a bit. I mean, this increased and uplifting opportunity holds promise for all of us—psoriatics, diabetics, and mid-lifers. What are the derms saying, Ed?

And what do you say? As a longtime Flake fan, I'd like to see you get back to the real stuff, the humor and creativity that one can bring to hardship—rather than sad stories of the victim's revenge.

My wife and I think Viagra's the greatest!!!!

<G> <G> <G> -The Fool

*****

Dear Fool: Okay, so I'm not the most up-to-date guy around. But who's the fool, here? Imagine my embarrassment when your e-mail prompted this phone conversation.

"Hello, Harvard and Carvey Pharmacy." Lloyd, my pharmacist, has answered the phone. Lloyd knows all about me, even this life-after-dark part of me called FLAKE HQ.

"Hi, Lloyd, Ed Dewke here. Should I be trying this new stuff called Viagara for my psoriasis?"

Long pause. "Well, Ed, that depends. Is your psoriasis causing THOSE KINDS of problems?"

In addition to being under-informed, I'm also slow on the up-take. "I've got an e-mail correspondent who swears by it. Even his wife loves it."

"I imagine," Lloyd says. I can hear him grinning. He adds, "I don't see why you couldn't take it—"

"Well, tell me about it, Lloyd. How does it help?"

Another pause, then, "Well, to tell you the truth, Ed, I rather imagine Viagara just makes you not think too much about your psoriasis when you don't want to."

"Stops the itching, huh?"

Now Lloyd laughs out loud. One single loud HAH, as though somebody just slapped him hard on the back and his false teeth shot out of his mouth. "No, Ed," he says. "I rather think the Viagara rekindles the itch."

Now I'm really perplexed. What kind of fool psoriatic would want to itch MORE? I'm contemplating this insanity when Lloyd asks, "Ed, do you know what Viagara is?"

And then he told me. Now I know. It's a male impotence drug. Read all about it at http://www.fda.gov/cder/news/viagra.htm. -Ed

P.S. - I'll have to make an appointment to see my GP because my cowardly derm won't write the prescrip!

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